i dont want to die yet
I LOVE EMO.
its wad definies who i am and who i want to be when i grow up. i want to be one of those of guys on the stage . screaming my lungs out to all the preety girls and boys. tearing my heart out of my body as i scream and scream. i want to have long sexy hair. i want to be able to see a mosh pit infront of me.i want to jump into the crowd. i want to feel the touch of my fans. to see into each of their eyes. to feel them grobing my every signle part of a body.
well thats my dream.....
back to reality. what is life? i wont lie that i never tot of ending my life before. before coming to jc. my life suck. all i did was study and study. i had so many bloody tution, there were times where i had 3 tuition a day. i slept at 6pm, woke up at 6am. even before the sun set i was sleeping, my life was screwed up. i didnt have any of those playstation , gameboy or computer games. the game i played was " homework" . there was a part of me during those times that really wanted to end my life. i even thought of how i shall end my life. i didnt care what would happen to my friends. i really was a damn emo guy.
but now...
life has come full circle for me. i love the way my life is at the moment. but the thing that i find quite intriguing is that i am not afraid of death. if i was to die today, i really dont mind, because i feel that i am happy. i know that i would hurt alot of ppl with my death, but if i do go, i really jsut want those people to be happy. of cause , i am not stupid enough to do that, i am educated, i still want to have my own family, i want to see my best friends get married, i want to see my classsmates when they are old, i want to enjoy the fruit of my success..
i know this post damn emo. but i jsut want to tell u all. enjoy yr life to the fullest. you maybe thinking that you are going throught a rough patch. where nothign is going right in yr life. you may even think of ending it. i am glad i never did it. god is fair. bleive in god, and you will be rewarded, i am at the stage of my life where i feel that i have to make a choice whether to be that emo guy or that retarded guy. i decided, i shall be the combination of both.
rest in peace my dark hatred suicidal emo part....rebirth of my retardness....
its wad definies who i am and who i want to be when i grow up. i want to be one of those of guys on the stage . screaming my lungs out to all the preety girls and boys. tearing my heart out of my body as i scream and scream. i want to have long sexy hair. i want to be able to see a mosh pit infront of me.i want to jump into the crowd. i want to feel the touch of my fans. to see into each of their eyes. to feel them grobing my every signle part of a body.
well thats my dream.....
back to reality. what is life? i wont lie that i never tot of ending my life before. before coming to jc. my life suck. all i did was study and study. i had so many bloody tution, there were times where i had 3 tuition a day. i slept at 6pm, woke up at 6am. even before the sun set i was sleeping, my life was screwed up. i didnt have any of those playstation , gameboy or computer games. the game i played was " homework" . there was a part of me during those times that really wanted to end my life. i even thought of how i shall end my life. i didnt care what would happen to my friends. i really was a damn emo guy.
but now...
life has come full circle for me. i love the way my life is at the moment. but the thing that i find quite intriguing is that i am not afraid of death. if i was to die today, i really dont mind, because i feel that i am happy. i know that i would hurt alot of ppl with my death, but if i do go, i really jsut want those people to be happy. of cause , i am not stupid enough to do that, i am educated, i still want to have my own family, i want to see my best friends get married, i want to see my classsmates when they are old, i want to enjoy the fruit of my success..
i know this post damn emo. but i jsut want to tell u all. enjoy yr life to the fullest. you maybe thinking that you are going throught a rough patch. where nothign is going right in yr life. you may even think of ending it. i am glad i never did it. god is fair. bleive in god, and you will be rewarded, i am at the stage of my life where i feel that i have to make a choice whether to be that emo guy or that retarded guy. i decided, i shall be the combination of both.
rest in peace my dark hatred suicidal emo part....rebirth of my retardness....
posted by brendonisemo at
1:31 AM
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